As you saw from the latest statistical quote, a large number of people are being abused.  The numbers reported are always lower than the actual numbers.  From all of  my observations, I am starting to conclude that more people are abused, raped, and molested than the ones who are not.

You may never be able to confront your abuser, to take legal action, or any other action that seems right to you.  Therefore, you need to get your life back.  Every time you put on another pound, every time your blood sugar goes up another point, every time you experience a flashback, every time your romantic evening is ruined because you can’t shake it off, your abuser wins.  Years and years after he or she is out of your life, has not touched you or talked to you, your abuser still has overwhelming power over you through the memories.  Your goal is to stop them.  Your goal is to enjoy life without thinking about your past.  It happened, it is behind you, and there is no reason for those events to affect you anymore.  There is no reason not to date men with a mustache just because the man who raped you had one.  There is no reason to eat in order to gain weight and be so unattractive that you would not have sex.  There is no reason to drink or use drugs so that the memories would not haunt you.  There is no reason.  You are at the very bottom of the hole, and the only way is up.  You do not have a choice of staying there because it affects every aspect of your life.  You shower in the morning, and washing yourself brings back the abuse as you touch the parts of the body that were touched by your abuser.  Some of the household items may have been used for penetration, and cooking breakfast, making the bed, taking out the garbage will trigger the flashback.  I am not even talking about being intimate with another person.

You have nowhere to run because the pain is not coming from the outside, but rather from the inside.

Every time you try to justify the abuse, just ask yourself if you would do the things that were done to you to another being. 

You do not have to forgive or forget.  You just need to live a happy life.

Notice I did not say ‘normal’ life.  Norm is defined differently by everyone, and for a part of your life, abuse was a norm.